If you read & then the shit hits the fan, you’ll have read that I sent Daughter number one – we’ll call her Dolores a message on WhatsApp.
That kind of escalated to a whole new level.
I have no defence, except that sometimes getting things off your chest is a good thing and after a few drinks ones sensibility tends to wane and ones thoughts of oh fuck it lets do it do get stronger.
So I did, I started off nice, said come on, there are two sides to any story, your Dad is not the monster your Mum has made him about to be, no matter what he loves you, you are his daughter….. And then after a particularly nasty I hate you, I’ve always hated you, this is all your fault, you ruined it for my parents message I kind of snapped, more spewed really and it went something like.
Hold on a minute, your Mum has lied to you and your sister about your Dad who is my Husband, your Dad did not, could not, would not, force your Mum to have an abortion, he is not the evil, abuse bastard she makes him out to be.
Have a chat, ask her about the time he tried to break up with her and she attacked him, did he retaliate physically no he ran.
Ask her about the time he came round to pick her up and saw her sat in the Car with another man snogging the face of him, the guy she told your Dad she was no longer with when they started going out but had obviously forget to tell this guy or herself they were finished.
Ask her about Z, the man she ended up living with after she left your Dad, the man she had not seen for years when he just happened to be parked up on a road that your Mum just happened to be walking down with you and your sister, who called after her from the car, who your mum then got into the car with and who drove you home, coming in, eating tea, playing in the garden with you and your sister.
Ask her how if she had not seen him for years, your Dads neighbour saw him many times at home when your Mum and Dad were married, when your Dad was at work, when you and your sister were at school, Ask her why when a man came to visit the bedroom blinds would be shut along with the windows.
Ask her who was driving the van that was used to empty the house, who moved your stuff to your new home while you were at School, Z fucking Z..!
Carry on believing that someone who could fuck someone in her marital bed, when her kids were at school, when her husband was at work, who had physically assaulted your Dad in the past, who had previously cheated on him, can be trusted to tell the truth about anything. The same woman who lied to me about your Dad, tried to split us up by accusing him of verbally abusing her on a day, at a time when he was in the car with me so was no where near…. Ask her, go on ask her, did she lie about the abortion too as the ultimate way to get you to hate your Dad.
Finishing off with I couldn’t give a flying fuck that you hate me, I really couldn’t, those that know me, like me for me, the honest, kind person that I am.
But he is your Dad Delores, your Dad and he has done nothing, nothing and look how he is hated, do something about that before he is dead and it is too late.
Chest cleared and I feel different, I’ve done it, maybe I shouldn’t but I’ve for once decided no, I am not being pleasant, making excuses, fuck with me or mine, lie and I will not stand for it – I can’t say that it feels good as it must have hurt, but for me it is good to have it off my chest, and maybe just maybe she will think on it, she is an adult now, maybe logic will make her see things differently and she’ll try with her Dad.
For me, I know this has really really really fucked it, but as she said she had hated me from day one, then really there is nothing to fuck as it was already fucked when she judged me and decided 6 years ago..